Est. MMXXVI · Office of the Registrar

Horton Business Schoolof Tremendous Achievement

"Where Excellence Is Never Questioned."

For generations, Horton has proudly recognized unparalleled greatness, tremendous achievement, and academic records too extraordinary for ordinary review. Our graduates have gone on to accomplish things so significant they cannot be publicly disclosed.

A satirical work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual institutions is regrettable.